Taintastic! tetrapeats at Urban Dare SF
Colby (the little guy hiding in the back of the picture) and Marty returned to Urban Dare San Francisco to try to win their 4th consecutive UD SF, and it was successful. Not to brag, but after multiple years of the same challenges over and over and over, our 3-legged and human wheelbarrow skills are honed sharp as a ginsu boning knife. We're pretty sure that the pair of 9 year old girls that we dominated during this year's 3-legged section of the race would agree.
After the race, we plied Kevin with beers at Kate O'Brien's, begging him to please change the scenery in next year's UD SF, or to bring back the Super Dare caribbean cruise. Were we successful? We'll see next year.
After the race, we plied Kevin with beers at Kate O'Brien's, begging him to please change the scenery in next year's UD SF, or to bring back the Super Dare caribbean cruise. Were we successful? We'll see next year.
Two Taints and a Sac take on the 2012 San Francisco Great Urban Race
The San Francisco Great Urban Race was back in town and we were determined to get on the podium this year or at least to have our glue-on mustaches stay on for the entire race. This year we had two Taintastic! teams racing (Marty, Matt and John were on one Taint team and Colby, Sloppy Jim, and Doug were on the other) Plus, our friends from Sacramento ..'Team Dropping Sac' were here to take on the race. So, the stage was set for an exciting day. Ten seconds before the start horn went off, Marty's mustache fell off so we were off to a good start!!
Both Taint teams cracked the clues quickly with the help of our phone team and we were off and running..... both in the same direction. Although we decided to run the race separately..... Most of the race was spent neck and neck. Or taint and taint as the case may be. After some kayaking, art gallery puzzles, and an assault on a small book store, both teams ended up in a boxing gym for a boxing lesson challenge. Matt got yelled at by the boxing instructor to put down the clue sheet .... but after losing clue sheets in previous races those things are glued to the hand. Late in the race when we got to the Miller 64 puzzle, Colby's team arrived a few minutes earlier and they were waiting in the middle of a long line for the puzzle. This was the last checkpoint for both teams and waiting in a line seemed to be sucking away our chances at a top 3 finish. So, Colby strenuously suggested that the second Taint team (Marty John and Matt) use the puzzle as a skip and instead run an additional 2 miles and up and down the Lyon street steps. On YELP, reviews of the Lyon steps can be found that refer to people puking in trash cans at the top. So, I'm not sure how that option seemed appealing at the time but Colby was really being persuasive and besides, he used to live one block from the steps so we figured he knew what he was talking about. After the third consecutive 20 percent grade hill it became clear that this may not be a wise choice and it's why we originally decided to skip the Lyon steps checkpoint. Oh well, it was worth the risk to split the teams at that point in hopes of still going top 3 with one of our teams. Matt, John and Marty just got an extra work-out for the day. And there was absolutely NO yelling at Colby at the finish line. None. That's for sure.
A long bus ride back to the start landed the two Taintastic! teams in 4th and 7th place 10 minutes apart. Still no podium but a fun race and we qualified for the Vegas championship! Dropping Sac finished 40 minutes later in 40th place. In their defense, they ran nearly 15 miles in a somewhat strange strategy forgoing any public transportation. Thanks again to our phone support. You guys are the best!
Both Taint teams cracked the clues quickly with the help of our phone team and we were off and running..... both in the same direction. Although we decided to run the race separately..... Most of the race was spent neck and neck. Or taint and taint as the case may be. After some kayaking, art gallery puzzles, and an assault on a small book store, both teams ended up in a boxing gym for a boxing lesson challenge. Matt got yelled at by the boxing instructor to put down the clue sheet .... but after losing clue sheets in previous races those things are glued to the hand. Late in the race when we got to the Miller 64 puzzle, Colby's team arrived a few minutes earlier and they were waiting in the middle of a long line for the puzzle. This was the last checkpoint for both teams and waiting in a line seemed to be sucking away our chances at a top 3 finish. So, Colby strenuously suggested that the second Taint team (Marty John and Matt) use the puzzle as a skip and instead run an additional 2 miles and up and down the Lyon street steps. On YELP, reviews of the Lyon steps can be found that refer to people puking in trash cans at the top. So, I'm not sure how that option seemed appealing at the time but Colby was really being persuasive and besides, he used to live one block from the steps so we figured he knew what he was talking about. After the third consecutive 20 percent grade hill it became clear that this may not be a wise choice and it's why we originally decided to skip the Lyon steps checkpoint. Oh well, it was worth the risk to split the teams at that point in hopes of still going top 3 with one of our teams. Matt, John and Marty just got an extra work-out for the day. And there was absolutely NO yelling at Colby at the finish line. None. That's for sure.
A long bus ride back to the start landed the two Taintastic! teams in 4th and 7th place 10 minutes apart. Still no podium but a fun race and we qualified for the Vegas championship! Dropping Sac finished 40 minutes later in 40th place. In their defense, they ran nearly 15 miles in a somewhat strange strategy forgoing any public transportation. Thanks again to our phone support. You guys are the best!
City Solved!
Matt, Marty and John took to the familiar streets of SF for a Citysolve race on 7/28. They were fast out of the gate, first to get to the clue sheet. But that advantage quickly turned sour when they misread a clue, causing them to go to an errant location, costing valuable minutes. Luckily the race allowed one skipped checkpoint per team, so that ended up being theirs.
With that hiccup out of the way, the team got in the groove and rattled off the checkpoints, aided by a couple of subway rides. Highlights included chasing a car for 5 minutes to get a 2 minute time deduction; Marty nearly getting pancaked by a (different) car ripping out of an alley; and the innovative race challenge that required us to find a stranger and stroke his leg.
Then back to the finish, to find once bonuses were tallied up (damn you, elusive Matt Lauer picture!), the team finished in second place! Taintastic!
With that hiccup out of the way, the team got in the groove and rattled off the checkpoints, aided by a couple of subway rides. Highlights included chasing a car for 5 minutes to get a 2 minute time deduction; Marty nearly getting pancaked by a (different) car ripping out of an alley; and the innovative race challenge that required us to find a stranger and stroke his leg.
Then back to the finish, to find once bonuses were tallied up (damn you, elusive Matt Lauer picture!), the team finished in second place! Taintastic!
Taintastic! FOUR-peats at the 2012 Sacramento Urban Dare!
This was the forth year racing the Sacramento Urban Dare and Matt along with Ken from Team Dropping Sac had won the previous three years. This year, Ken was hurt so Colby agreed to step in. Since Colby didn't know the area, he did what any good teammate would do to prepare for the race: spending the 20 minutes right before the race deciding whether or not he should wear aviator sunglasses. Matt, on the other hand, quickly lost the race passport somewhere between the registration area and the bathroom right before the race start. So, a typical race start for Taintastic!
With close to 180 teams we knew we had to pull it together before the start and we had a top notch clue solving team on the phone to get us going. Within minutes of getting the clues, we were off and hitting most of the 11 checkpoints without many problems visiting places like Ironsides and Chicago Fire in midtown Sacramento. There were a couple of noteworthy speed bumps along the way. In what is not the first of such episodes, Colby challenged a member of the race staff at the three-legged race checkpoint to make sure he knew the race rules. Plus, we had a bit of a mix up at the spellbound challenge and had some trouble finding a walking dog statue for a bonus checkpoint creating a mini Matt meltdown. (We spent about 10 minutes working on this 5 minute bonus question). The meltdown didn't last long as Colby yelled at Matt to "get your head in the game" and we were back on track. In the end, some fast running and amazing clue support helped us cross the finish line in first. Another victory was in the books!!
Colby took his usual post-race water bottle shower in the parking lot to make a quick escape for lunch plans (much to the amusement of the neighbors). Huge thanks to an amazing clue solving effort from Mike Freedogg and Mart for making it a great day of racing!!
With close to 180 teams we knew we had to pull it together before the start and we had a top notch clue solving team on the phone to get us going. Within minutes of getting the clues, we were off and hitting most of the 11 checkpoints without many problems visiting places like Ironsides and Chicago Fire in midtown Sacramento. There were a couple of noteworthy speed bumps along the way. In what is not the first of such episodes, Colby challenged a member of the race staff at the three-legged race checkpoint to make sure he knew the race rules. Plus, we had a bit of a mix up at the spellbound challenge and had some trouble finding a walking dog statue for a bonus checkpoint creating a mini Matt meltdown. (We spent about 10 minutes working on this 5 minute bonus question). The meltdown didn't last long as Colby yelled at Matt to "get your head in the game" and we were back on track. In the end, some fast running and amazing clue support helped us cross the finish line in first. Another victory was in the books!!
Colby took his usual post-race water bottle shower in the parking lot to make a quick escape for lunch plans (much to the amusement of the neighbors). Huge thanks to an amazing clue solving effort from Mike Freedogg and Mart for making it a great day of racing!!
Taintastic starts 2012 with the Mission Street Scramble
Matt and Colby along with newcomer Sloppy Jim took to the Mission and surrounding neighborhoods in San Francisco to run for 90 minutes collecting various checkpoints. Jim has helped out Taintastic with phone support on a few occasions in the past, and he's famous for the "Wax Museum incident". This time around, Jim was looking to do well in his first Taintastic race as a runner with the team. However, the Taintastic holiday training program involved less running and more beer imbibing, so we were not in tip top shape as a team. In inspecting the map and picking a route strategy, Colby announced... "We are NOT going up that hill". There were minimal complaints from the rest of the team with this announcement, so we planned a "Colby route" with minimal hills, newly paved asphalt, nicely shaded tree lined streets and a lemonade stand. Sloppy Jim was the one teammate in great shape for this race and was pushing the pace as we hit most of the checkpoints pretty cleanly (save for the heroine needle hurdle we had to perform in an alley section) After 9 miles of stop and go running/sprinting we ended up in third place overall for the 90 minute division. As it turns out we may need to go up some hills next time to beat the best! Welcome to Taintastic racing Jim!!!
The Buses were Laughing at Taintastic at the 2011 CitySolve Finals
Its finals time!! After resting the legs and eating some quick food, the top ten teams were ready to race for the $5000 prize! Marty decided to wear leg tights for the afternoon race to add to the intimidation factor, but I think people just thought he was injured. Playing possum.... very nice. The start of the race challenged teams to throw a playing card into a beer pitcher from a distance. Quickly finding out the correct technique from Youtube was less help than we thought as most teams crumpled up the card and made the task much easier. OK...making baskets may not be our forte..... a foreshadowing to a later check point meltdown.
After getting the clue sheets, it was clear that these clues were not messing around. We would need an amazing effort from our clue crew and we got it ....but it was hard to figure out a good race route all day. Our first checkpoint, was a marshmallow toss into a coffee cup and a
"name all the reindeer" challenge. Barely remembering Rudolph with seconds to go, we passed the test and started heading toward UNLV campus for where we suspected many of the clues were located. It seemed like a bus would be perfect to get to the next checkpoint, but no such luck. We were hoofing it all the way. On some tired legs, we got to the basketball challenge in which we had to make 9 shots each. Misses were penalized, but we misunderstood the degree of penalty handed out so we started throwing shots up like a "Pop-a-shot" game. Big mistake! While Matt missed his fair share of shots, Marty abused the rim with an assortment of bricks that had Matt running an extra mile in the gym just collecting rebounds! 20 minutes in penalties later (we learned about this penalty after the race) we ran miles and miles collecting the rest of the needed checkpoints. NO buses heading our way for most of the day..... and when we finally did catch a bus on the Strip we got caught in crazy traffic. We watched as people sauntered up the strip faster than us sitting in traffic. The bus driver snickered a bit as we pleaded to let us off before the stop. No such luck. Finally getting off the bus (which also passed our needed checkpoint by a block) we got the last checkpoint and ran down the strip looking for a Michael Jackson impersonator for a bonus clue. Although we saw 14 Elvis impersonators which were nowhere to be seen last year when we needed him, no Michael Jackson anywhere. So we finished without the Jackson bonus and needed to solve an anagram puzzle before we were done. Marty more than made up for his basketball issues by crushing the anagram and we were officially done!
We actually crossed the finish line in second, but ended up with a 3rd place finish behind the NADs again after penalties and bonuses were counted. A good and unexpected finish to a long day since we had no idea where we stood in the race for most of the day. We owe it all to our clue crew who put us in the position to do so well! You guys are awesome.
After a long day of racing we grabbed dinner with the NADs, Avenging Narwhals and Agents before partying in the hotel club VIP
section (purchased by Zack Attack, the winning team!). Cant wait to do it again next year!!
After getting the clue sheets, it was clear that these clues were not messing around. We would need an amazing effort from our clue crew and we got it ....but it was hard to figure out a good race route all day. Our first checkpoint, was a marshmallow toss into a coffee cup and a
"name all the reindeer" challenge. Barely remembering Rudolph with seconds to go, we passed the test and started heading toward UNLV campus for where we suspected many of the clues were located. It seemed like a bus would be perfect to get to the next checkpoint, but no such luck. We were hoofing it all the way. On some tired legs, we got to the basketball challenge in which we had to make 9 shots each. Misses were penalized, but we misunderstood the degree of penalty handed out so we started throwing shots up like a "Pop-a-shot" game. Big mistake! While Matt missed his fair share of shots, Marty abused the rim with an assortment of bricks that had Matt running an extra mile in the gym just collecting rebounds! 20 minutes in penalties later (we learned about this penalty after the race) we ran miles and miles collecting the rest of the needed checkpoints. NO buses heading our way for most of the day..... and when we finally did catch a bus on the Strip we got caught in crazy traffic. We watched as people sauntered up the strip faster than us sitting in traffic. The bus driver snickered a bit as we pleaded to let us off before the stop. No such luck. Finally getting off the bus (which also passed our needed checkpoint by a block) we got the last checkpoint and ran down the strip looking for a Michael Jackson impersonator for a bonus clue. Although we saw 14 Elvis impersonators which were nowhere to be seen last year when we needed him, no Michael Jackson anywhere. So we finished without the Jackson bonus and needed to solve an anagram puzzle before we were done. Marty more than made up for his basketball issues by crushing the anagram and we were officially done!
We actually crossed the finish line in second, but ended up with a 3rd place finish behind the NADs again after penalties and bonuses were counted. A good and unexpected finish to a long day since we had no idea where we stood in the race for most of the day. We owe it all to our clue crew who put us in the position to do so well! You guys are awesome.
After a long day of racing we grabbed dinner with the NADs, Avenging Narwhals and Agents before partying in the hotel club VIP
section (purchased by Zack Attack, the winning team!). Cant wait to do it again next year!!
Magical Homeless Man helps Taintastic cruise to a second place finish at the 2011 CitySolve Championship Pre-lims!!
After winning the San Francisco CitySolve earlier this year, Marty and Matt landed in Vegas for the National Championships with high hopes. The top ten finishers in this morning race would qualify for the afternoon final race for a $5000 prize and we wanted to be a part of that race! At the registration, the check in staff mistakenly thought we were the legendary Team "Dropping Sac" and seemed disappointed that we were just Taintatic! but we shook it off and got ready to go.
At the start of the race, we ran to the Excalibur to pick up our clues.... but had some trouble getting the clues to our seasoned problem solving team. Phone issues and high winds blowing our clues down the street threatened to derail us from the start. Perhaps Matt should upgrade his phone from a 1999 flip phone for future races. Duly noted. After finally starting to make some headway with the clues, we ran to a comedy club where Marty told his famous "interrupting cow" joke for the first check point. We had most of the points plotted after that and started to hit most of them cleanly, posing
with and Alien at the Atomic test museum, yelling "I'm on a Boat" in front of New York- New York, and
playing Cornhole at the Tropicana pool among other tasks. The highlight of this race was the magical homeless man we ran into when trying to find Terrible's Casino. After pointing us in the right direction, we ran 1/2 mile to the casino when only moments later he appeared at the hotel with us. Strange?! Then, he seemed to know Marty's Iphone iOS5 camera functions better than we did and was able to take our picture in front of the hotel. We may have to recruit this guy for future races!!
We raced home past a couple of teams to land in second for the morning race just a couple of minutes off the race winners and last year's Great Urban Race champions Team Nads. We felt pretty good about finishing so close to the Nads until we realized they had to go to an extra checkpoint due to a race glitch. So, we knew we had to step it up for the afternoon finals!!
Much thanks to our speedy clue team for solving the clues with lighting speed. You guys are amazing!
At the start of the race, we ran to the Excalibur to pick up our clues.... but had some trouble getting the clues to our seasoned problem solving team. Phone issues and high winds blowing our clues down the street threatened to derail us from the start. Perhaps Matt should upgrade his phone from a 1999 flip phone for future races. Duly noted. After finally starting to make some headway with the clues, we ran to a comedy club where Marty told his famous "interrupting cow" joke for the first check point. We had most of the points plotted after that and started to hit most of them cleanly, posing
with and Alien at the Atomic test museum, yelling "I'm on a Boat" in front of New York- New York, and
playing Cornhole at the Tropicana pool among other tasks. The highlight of this race was the magical homeless man we ran into when trying to find Terrible's Casino. After pointing us in the right direction, we ran 1/2 mile to the casino when only moments later he appeared at the hotel with us. Strange?! Then, he seemed to know Marty's Iphone iOS5 camera functions better than we did and was able to take our picture in front of the hotel. We may have to recruit this guy for future races!!
We raced home past a couple of teams to land in second for the morning race just a couple of minutes off the race winners and last year's Great Urban Race champions Team Nads. We felt pretty good about finishing so close to the Nads until we realized they had to go to an extra checkpoint due to a race glitch. So, we knew we had to step it up for the afternoon finals!!
Much thanks to our speedy clue team for solving the clues with lighting speed. You guys are amazing!
The Spraining of the Taint
In the final 2011 Big Blue Adventure Sprint in Lake Tahoe, Colby and Matt took on a familiar Northstar course against a pretty small field (It proved hard for Big Blue to compete with Tough Mudder on the same day). In winding down this season, Colby tried a new training strategy in which he didn't really run or bike or kayak all that much to prepare.... but he did sufficient carbo loading all week! To be fair, if there is one member of Taintastic that can step up his game on race day, it's Colby, and he brings an uncanny ability to recall past race routes/trails without looking at a map. Just to make things more interesting, Colby badly sprained his ankle in the first mile of the race and proclaimed that he might not be able to go on...... but Matt used his physical therapy skills in a nurturing and encouraging manner as he screamed at Colby to suck it up and get on his bike. The ankle loosened up a bit on the bike and kayak legs before getting to the mid-course run that Colby was able to limp through like a dedicated Kerri Strug . A strong bike to the finish felt great as we had won the race and Taintastic had secured another Sprint title! Colby pleaded with Matt to carry him to the podium like Strug's gymnastic coach, but Matt deemed it untaintly. Go Taintastic!!!
Taint Club Part Deux: Defending the Oyster!
In a recent race, Colby and Marty had added newcomer Doug to the squad for Urban Dare. Continuing the community outreach trend, Marty and Matt raced with standout stand-in John at the 2011 SF Oyster this past weekend, as Colby and Chris were both unavailable. To add to the fun, our friends (and crowd favorites) Dropping Sac came into town to race their first Oyster.
Taintastic didn't miss a beat with John aboard. Though he struggled inside the rock gym (a nice homage to Colby), he quickly rebounded by kissing the dog that tried to chew off Matt's face. John did a nice job along with the rest of the team on the other challenges that the Oyster threw at them - trampolines, a swim relay, getting sandy at baker beach, chipping (albeit poorly) at Presidio golf course, fingerpainting while drinking vodka, doing puzzles at the baseball stadium, and more (was this a race or a bachelor party??). Not to mention bicycling one-handed, using the other hand to push Marty up the Presidio hills.
The race ended at just the right time, as the legs were getting very tired and the team was a little tipsy from downing a couple vodka/lemonades at the last stop. But all of the above added up to another Taintastic! victory, a repeat win at the SF Oyster.
Many thanks to the Oyster folks for another top-notch event, they never disappoint. And to Dr. Dunk for holding down the transition area for us again, as well as the rest of our raceday supporters for coming out despite the chilly weather. A shout out to our friends at Dropping Sac for making the trip and putting together a fine first Oyster. And to our sponsors, oh wait we choose not to have any for some reason.
Taintastic didn't miss a beat with John aboard. Though he struggled inside the rock gym (a nice homage to Colby), he quickly rebounded by kissing the dog that tried to chew off Matt's face. John did a nice job along with the rest of the team on the other challenges that the Oyster threw at them - trampolines, a swim relay, getting sandy at baker beach, chipping (albeit poorly) at Presidio golf course, fingerpainting while drinking vodka, doing puzzles at the baseball stadium, and more (was this a race or a bachelor party??). Not to mention bicycling one-handed, using the other hand to push Marty up the Presidio hills.
The race ended at just the right time, as the legs were getting very tired and the team was a little tipsy from downing a couple vodka/lemonades at the last stop. But all of the above added up to another Taintastic! victory, a repeat win at the SF Oyster.
Many thanks to the Oyster folks for another top-notch event, they never disappoint. And to Dr. Dunk for holding down the transition area for us again, as well as the rest of our raceday supporters for coming out despite the chilly weather. A shout out to our friends at Dropping Sac for making the trip and putting together a fine first Oyster. And to our sponsors, oh wait we choose not to have any for some reason.
Taint Club
Colby and Marty recently attempted to threepeat the Urban Dare San Francisco, and this time were joined by Wingman Doug. The more the merrier!
Upon receiving the clue sheet to start the race, Colby floored the team by looking at one of the clues, which only said "whale mural", and he said "That's on the corner of O'Farrell and Polk. Just trust me." Not knowing Colby to be either an art lover or a marine biologist, Doug and Marty were confused, but excited to have one of the clues solved immediately. Once we reached that clue later in the race, all became clear as the whale mural was next door to the O'Farrell Theater. That was actually the second, um, "entertainment establishment" the race ran us to that day, and we are starting to see where race director Kevin is getting his ideas from.
Things did get tense to start the race, as the team burned 10 minutes trying to find the first checkpoint, Sinbad's restaurant, that was placed 30 yards from the starting line as a gimme. But the rest was all good, and Wing-runner Doug really provided most of the highlights for the day. He ran strong out in front. He dominated the bubblegum/whipped cream challenge. Not surprisingly, after a long summer of gluttony, Colby spent the majority of the race trailing behind the team trying to convince everyone to join him in the "run a block, walk a block" strategy. More than one innocent bystander looked at him cross-eyed as he sluggishly limped down the sidewalks of San Francisco with a huge snot hanging from his face. While not pretty to watch, the strategy worked. Threepeat!
Many thanks to Aurelie, Elise, and Matt for dominating the clues for us. As history has clearly shown, the less thinking that Taintastic! has to do, the better.
Upon receiving the clue sheet to start the race, Colby floored the team by looking at one of the clues, which only said "whale mural", and he said "That's on the corner of O'Farrell and Polk. Just trust me." Not knowing Colby to be either an art lover or a marine biologist, Doug and Marty were confused, but excited to have one of the clues solved immediately. Once we reached that clue later in the race, all became clear as the whale mural was next door to the O'Farrell Theater. That was actually the second, um, "entertainment establishment" the race ran us to that day, and we are starting to see where race director Kevin is getting his ideas from.
Things did get tense to start the race, as the team burned 10 minutes trying to find the first checkpoint, Sinbad's restaurant, that was placed 30 yards from the starting line as a gimme. But the rest was all good, and Wing-runner Doug really provided most of the highlights for the day. He ran strong out in front. He dominated the bubblegum/whipped cream challenge. Not surprisingly, after a long summer of gluttony, Colby spent the majority of the race trailing behind the team trying to convince everyone to join him in the "run a block, walk a block" strategy. More than one innocent bystander looked at him cross-eyed as he sluggishly limped down the sidewalks of San Francisco with a huge snot hanging from his face. While not pretty to watch, the strategy worked. Threepeat!
Many thanks to Aurelie, Elise, and Matt for dominating the clues for us. As history has clearly shown, the less thinking that Taintastic! has to do, the better.
Raiders of the Lost Taint
On a warm August day, Matt and Marty took to the streets of San Francisco to compete in the CitySolve race series. Ten clues/checkpoints, and two bonus objectives to tackle.
The initial five checkpoints were located downtown. The first got off to a rocky start, as Matt lost an improv poetry slam against a rival team, but he quickly rebounded by beating the improv troupe themselves. It then got a little more embarrassing as the CitySolve cameraman, carrying a 20 pound videocamera rig above his head, outran us down Market Street on the way to the next checkpoint, he was dominating! But we got it together, and hit the next 4 checkpoints uneventfully, completing the first half of the race.
We then grabbed a subway to the Mission for the remaining checkpoints. We were really on our game until our final stop at Sports Basement where we had to play "flipcup". Matt was successful on his 3rd attempt, but it took Marty about 62 tries. Very reminiscent of the team's poor performance in Beer Pong in last year's SF Oyster, somehow all of the time we spend in bars isn't paying off. Confidence shaken by the flipcup fiasco, we ran a dozen blocks to the finish line, only to find we were the first team to arrive! A quick review of our photos confirmed us as the winner. A quick review of our GPS got us excited when we saw we had run a mile in just over 90 seconds, until we realized that mile was on the subway, not on foot.
Check out Marty who finally made the post race video.
Thanks to CitySolve for a fun and well-run event. And thanks to our trivia support crew of Chris, Mike, and Summer, with cameos from Adria and Sloppy Jim
The initial five checkpoints were located downtown. The first got off to a rocky start, as Matt lost an improv poetry slam against a rival team, but he quickly rebounded by beating the improv troupe themselves. It then got a little more embarrassing as the CitySolve cameraman, carrying a 20 pound videocamera rig above his head, outran us down Market Street on the way to the next checkpoint, he was dominating! But we got it together, and hit the next 4 checkpoints uneventfully, completing the first half of the race.
We then grabbed a subway to the Mission for the remaining checkpoints. We were really on our game until our final stop at Sports Basement where we had to play "flipcup". Matt was successful on his 3rd attempt, but it took Marty about 62 tries. Very reminiscent of the team's poor performance in Beer Pong in last year's SF Oyster, somehow all of the time we spend in bars isn't paying off. Confidence shaken by the flipcup fiasco, we ran a dozen blocks to the finish line, only to find we were the first team to arrive! A quick review of our photos confirmed us as the winner. A quick review of our GPS got us excited when we saw we had run a mile in just over 90 seconds, until we realized that mile was on the subway, not on foot.
Check out Marty who finally made the post race video.
Thanks to CitySolve for a fun and well-run event. And thanks to our trivia support crew of Chris, Mike, and Summer, with cameos from Adria and Sloppy Jim
2011 Pacheco Pass Adventure Challenge: Reservoir Taints!
It started off like any other race; Marty asked someone else to register the team, then didn't pay for the event, then asked for a ride to the event, then wouldn't let the team driver (Colby) crash on his couch to save 45 mins of driving at 4 AM, then didn't want to wear the team jersey once we got to the race, and then didn't want to do the write up after the race. Readers may find themselves asking: "What DID Marty do?" The answer is simple, he went over the handlebars. Probably more than once.
Pacheco Pass at first glance is a beautiful recreation area. Upon entering the park you immediately descend 1500 feet to the lake parking lot where it becomes abundantly clear that the only possible run/bike routes are straight up imposing washouts and dried-up canyons. The only section promising to be flat was the kayak...but that was before the 20 knot winds took hold of the angry water, essentially turning it into the Bering Sea. With search and rescue boats and jet ski's at the ready, the race would surely go on.
The first leg of the race was around 5 miles of trailblazing. Usually trailblazing for Taintastic! means that someone thinks that there's a faster route to a CP than a well groomed and semi-flat trail through thick patches of poison oak, a maze of brush with prickers, knee high grassy fields, and very steep terrain. At Pacheco Pass it just means that there are no trails to begin with...all of that other stuff still applies. And while we hit checkpoints like Bobby Brown hits Whitney Houston, and Whitney Houston hits a crack pipe, we found ourselves 12 mins behind the leaders entering the kayak section, which was painfully windy, choppy and wet. Upon seeing the other kayaks getting pounded by an onslaught of 2-3 foot swells, Marty demanded to sit in the rear of the boat. Essentially using Colby as a shield from the buckets of water being thrown at them. After about an hour and fifteen mins of the Log Flume, Taintastic! was relieved to find out that they made up about half of the time needed to be back with the leaders.
The best part of the race was arriving at the first bike CP and seeing the other teams looking at us like, "what the ef are they doing here." We continued to hold our own until an optional CP got the best of us and we spent the better part of an hour determined to find it. After all, the word optional is for quitters. We never did find that CP...I think Todd Jackson may have placed that one. After a very long day of Colby dealing with two broken pedals and Marty going over the handlebars,Taintastic! arrived at the finish line with 40 mins to get as many additional optional CPs as possible. We got one...and it took 63 mins. But when all was said and done, and penalties and credits were accounted for, Taintastic! was on the podium with a bronze medal. Based on Marty's medical history the only logical thing left for him to do was strip naked in the parking lot, dump a tube of Tecnu all over himself like he was Jessica Simpson washing the General Lee, and jump in the lake. That, and run errands for his wife on the way home. Taintastic!
Pacheco Pass at first glance is a beautiful recreation area. Upon entering the park you immediately descend 1500 feet to the lake parking lot where it becomes abundantly clear that the only possible run/bike routes are straight up imposing washouts and dried-up canyons. The only section promising to be flat was the kayak...but that was before the 20 knot winds took hold of the angry water, essentially turning it into the Bering Sea. With search and rescue boats and jet ski's at the ready, the race would surely go on.
The first leg of the race was around 5 miles of trailblazing. Usually trailblazing for Taintastic! means that someone thinks that there's a faster route to a CP than a well groomed and semi-flat trail through thick patches of poison oak, a maze of brush with prickers, knee high grassy fields, and very steep terrain. At Pacheco Pass it just means that there are no trails to begin with...all of that other stuff still applies. And while we hit checkpoints like Bobby Brown hits Whitney Houston, and Whitney Houston hits a crack pipe, we found ourselves 12 mins behind the leaders entering the kayak section, which was painfully windy, choppy and wet. Upon seeing the other kayaks getting pounded by an onslaught of 2-3 foot swells, Marty demanded to sit in the rear of the boat. Essentially using Colby as a shield from the buckets of water being thrown at them. After about an hour and fifteen mins of the Log Flume, Taintastic! was relieved to find out that they made up about half of the time needed to be back with the leaders.
The best part of the race was arriving at the first bike CP and seeing the other teams looking at us like, "what the ef are they doing here." We continued to hold our own until an optional CP got the best of us and we spent the better part of an hour determined to find it. After all, the word optional is for quitters. We never did find that CP...I think Todd Jackson may have placed that one. After a very long day of Colby dealing with two broken pedals and Marty going over the handlebars,Taintastic! arrived at the finish line with 40 mins to get as many additional optional CPs as possible. We got one...and it took 63 mins. But when all was said and done, and penalties and credits were accounted for, Taintastic! was on the podium with a bronze medal. Based on Marty's medical history the only logical thing left for him to do was strip naked in the parking lot, dump a tube of Tecnu all over himself like he was Jessica Simpson washing the General Lee, and jump in the lake. That, and run errands for his wife on the way home. Taintastic!
No Extra Credit at the 2011 Great Urban Race SF
After running our way to a great finish in last year's Great Urban Race Championships, Team TAINT hoped to keep the momentum this year in San Francisco. Matt and Chris were ready to run and had seasoned phone support on standby. Unfortunately, our team knows the San Francisco MUNI bus system about as well as the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow (African or European?). Sadly, the bulk of our day was spent sitting on the bus for long spells. If you think that gives us time to decipher clues and plot the right course, you would be mistaken.
Despite dominating challenges like balloon animal construction and beer identification by smell we were far from perfect. For one, Chris mistakenly drank 3 hour warm beer. Next, one of our support crew decided to add a few extra race checkpoints (we'll just call him Sloppy J to protect his identity). Nothing against the San Francisco wax museum, it just wasn’t part of the race. Matt nearly assaulted the wax museum staff thinking that he was hiding information we needed before realizing we were 5 miles away from the actual checkpoint in Noe Valley. Some other rookie mistakes like reading the race sheet cost us a few extra minutes. In all, we finished 8th out of the 278 teams. The highlight of the race was competing with some friends from Sacramento with their brand new team name "Dropping Sac". Its good times when "Dropping Sac" and "Taintastic" get together!
Special thanks to Boosh, Mike, Jim (Sloppy J) and Summer for all the support. Beer on us next time we meet!
Despite dominating challenges like balloon animal construction and beer identification by smell we were far from perfect. For one, Chris mistakenly drank 3 hour warm beer. Next, one of our support crew decided to add a few extra race checkpoints (we'll just call him Sloppy J to protect his identity). Nothing against the San Francisco wax museum, it just wasn’t part of the race. Matt nearly assaulted the wax museum staff thinking that he was hiding information we needed before realizing we were 5 miles away from the actual checkpoint in Noe Valley. Some other rookie mistakes like reading the race sheet cost us a few extra minutes. In all, we finished 8th out of the 278 teams. The highlight of the race was competing with some friends from Sacramento with their brand new team name "Dropping Sac". Its good times when "Dropping Sac" and "Taintastic" get together!
Special thanks to Boosh, Mike, Jim (Sloppy J) and Summer for all the support. Beer on us next time we meet!
Taintastic Races Fast and Dumb in the 2011 NorCal Wilder Ranch AR
On what was a great day for racing in the hills of Santa Cruz, Colby and Matt had trouble reading a basic map, following simple instructions and distinguishing left from right. After a solid run to grab a checkpoint along the coast to start to race, the team started the bike leg near the front of the pack only to take an early wrong turn. Getting lost for 20-30 minutes on marked trails may seem difficult to do, but that's the magic of Taintastic! Once back on track, the team had to play major catch-up on some fantastic bike trails, rolling running paths and invigorating coasteering sections. Despite the detour at the start, Matt and Colby hit the next 10 check points well and were headed for a decent finish......until we got to the end and realized we forgot to stop at the last checkpoint. So we rode back to get the last point for another 20 minutes of racing before coming in 10th overall and 8th in the team division. Not the finish we wanted, but the course terrain and the race set-up were fantastic. We'll be back to do it again next year.....and hopefully bring our brains along with our legs.
The Silence of the Taints
On a gorgeous June weekend, Matt and Marty headed down to central California to compete in the Lopez Lake Sprint race, part of the Central Coast Adventure series.
This race staff is known for putting together events that are a cut above the usual Sprint fare, and they didn't disappoint. In addition to spicing things up by installing a 700-foot zipline and utilizing the local waterslides, they turned the trail run into something that is best described as scrabbling up a crumbly mountain. Wild.
The pair received a bad omen at 10p the night before when one of Matt's bike tubes exploded in the motel room. Not surprisingly, he quickly assigned blame to the nearby mini-fridge. This bad vibe carried over to the first leg of the race, as they flipped their kayak in the first 20 seconds (someone appreciately yelled 'Nice dismount!'), then struggled some more with their kayak route. Once done with the kayak leg, though, they cleaned up their acts and were able to make up some ground on the waterslide / bike / zipline/ scrabbling segments, finishing in 8th place against a strong field.
Many thanks to All Out Events for putting on a great race. And for the Tecnu showers afterward.
This race staff is known for putting together events that are a cut above the usual Sprint fare, and they didn't disappoint. In addition to spicing things up by installing a 700-foot zipline and utilizing the local waterslides, they turned the trail run into something that is best described as scrabbling up a crumbly mountain. Wild.
The pair received a bad omen at 10p the night before when one of Matt's bike tubes exploded in the motel room. Not surprisingly, he quickly assigned blame to the nearby mini-fridge. This bad vibe carried over to the first leg of the race, as they flipped their kayak in the first 20 seconds (someone appreciately yelled 'Nice dismount!'), then struggled some more with their kayak route. Once done with the kayak leg, though, they cleaned up their acts and were able to make up some ground on the waterslide / bike / zipline/ scrabbling segments, finishing in 8th place against a strong field.
Many thanks to All Out Events for putting on a great race. And for the Tecnu showers afterward.
The Good, The Bad, and The TAINT
Yes, Daddy should go faster
Setting aside Memorial Day weekend plans for a few hours, Marty and Chris represented Team Taintastic at the Big Blue Half Moon Bay Adventure Race. And despite a total lack of confidence from one, the team secured our second victory of the season with a wire-to-wire win.
This years race was best told through an analogy of the Good, the Bad and the Ugly. The Good included no bees, significantly upgraded kayaks and a familiar route. The Bad was cookie dough consistency mud trails, an over grown “stairway to heaven” climb that half the field skipped and rain. The Ugly was far too much enthusiasm from the BB staff when they thought we were not winning the race!
The team benefited from strong race support with Wyatt and Stacy on site. Technically Andy was there too but he did not cheer much despite carbo loading with Peeps. The highlight of the day was Andy’s “Go Faster Daddy” sign which means he knew Marty was dogging it even before seeing him in the actual adventure race.
Read what the Half Moon Bay Review had to say about the race.
This years race was best told through an analogy of the Good, the Bad and the Ugly. The Good included no bees, significantly upgraded kayaks and a familiar route. The Bad was cookie dough consistency mud trails, an over grown “stairway to heaven” climb that half the field skipped and rain. The Ugly was far too much enthusiasm from the BB staff when they thought we were not winning the race!
The team benefited from strong race support with Wyatt and Stacy on site. Technically Andy was there too but he did not cheer much despite carbo loading with Peeps. The highlight of the day was Andy’s “Go Faster Daddy” sign which means he knew Marty was dogging it even before seeing him in the actual adventure race.
Read what the Half Moon Bay Review had to say about the race.
What a Long Strange TAINT Its Been - Folsom 3 PEAT
Great new shirts!
The 2011 Adventure Race season kicked off with Matt and Chris defending Taintastic's title at the Big Blue Folsom Lake AR Sprint this past weekend. All the winter rain resulted in the lake being much higher than years past making for a longer kayak (something that would prove critical). The other sections of the course were all a bit longer to better challenge the racers. A nice Easter touch was collecting PEEPs throughout the day as evidence of hitting check points. PEEP + Folsom Lake = Syrup in Your Pocket.
The race began with a ~3 mile trail run which really spread the field. Taintastic! entered the transition area in 3rd place but figured the lead teams may have gone out a bit too fast. Unfortunately, they did not. We decided to keep a quick but manageable pace on the bikes and hopefully stay within striking distance. We regained and held third place through the remaining run, bike, physical challenge, beach run and final mountain bike. Entering the transition area for the last time, we could see the lead teams about 200 yards into the kayak. Not good. We noticed the other teams having a bit of trouble staying on course and figured we had an outside chance if we really bore down. Our TAINTS were swift, at the turn we overtook the solo racer (huge disadvantage in the kayak alone) and had closed the gap to less than 100 yards on the leaders. At the same clip, we'd be neck and neck hitting the beach. That proved exactly right as we pulled up and took the lead about 50 yards from shore.
Once we hit the beach, it was a quick run with the kayak for TAINTASTIC! to take the Folsom Lake Sprint title for our third year in a row. Happy but exhausted.
The race began with a ~3 mile trail run which really spread the field. Taintastic! entered the transition area in 3rd place but figured the lead teams may have gone out a bit too fast. Unfortunately, they did not. We decided to keep a quick but manageable pace on the bikes and hopefully stay within striking distance. We regained and held third place through the remaining run, bike, physical challenge, beach run and final mountain bike. Entering the transition area for the last time, we could see the lead teams about 200 yards into the kayak. Not good. We noticed the other teams having a bit of trouble staying on course and figured we had an outside chance if we really bore down. Our TAINTS were swift, at the turn we overtook the solo racer (huge disadvantage in the kayak alone) and had closed the gap to less than 100 yards on the leaders. At the same clip, we'd be neck and neck hitting the beach. That proved exactly right as we pulled up and took the lead about 50 yards from shore.
Once we hit the beach, it was a quick run with the kayak for TAINTASTIC! to take the Folsom Lake Sprint title for our third year in a row. Happy but exhausted.
Ultra Marathon Matt: 2011 American River 50
Team Taintastic has run a number of marathons over the past few years - but never two in a row. That's exactly what Matt did at the American River 50. In less than 8 hours, Matt cruised over rolling hills, fallen logs, muddy creek beds, deep ravines and poison oak forests to reach the finish. Not a bad start to the 2011 season.
In ten days we should know exactly how many poison oak forests Matt ran through but we're sure it was worth it. Ice bath!
In ten days we should know exactly how many poison oak forests Matt ran through but we're sure it was worth it. Ice bath!
Elvis Left the Building for TAINT in 2010 GUR Finals
Best Elvis in Vegas!
It all came down to this - the Elite 8. After a quick bite and quickly checking out alternate entrances to the Luxor (this will be key) Matt, Chris and their same, nasty TAINTASTIC gear from the morning race went to the start of the GUR finals. Upon arrival, we were blindfolded, given multiple coded wrist bands, asked to turn off cell phones, put in a stretched Hummer limo and taken to the start of the race.
About 20 minutes later we emerged from the limo and were shuffled with the other 7 teams to a courtyard where we needed to solve a quick puzzle and were awarded a hotel room key. In the hotel room was a locked safe with instructions on how to open. Once we unscrambled the code for the safe, we opened it up and got our clue sheet.
Turns out all teams were driven to downtown Las Vegas about 2 miles north of the strip. Our first challenge was to zip line across downtown. Chris negotiated the zip line while Matt negotiated a drunk tourist on the elevator. Good start. Then Chris and Matt both took a Deuce (its a bus line, seriously) back to the strip. Along the strip we were neck and neck with all the teams. In what proved to be a tactical error, team TAINT decided to skip an early checkpoint to save time but that required us to complete all others. Among them was the task to get a team photo with an Elvis. How hard is it to find an Elvis is Las Vegas?
The next series of checkpoints were great. Chris gave Matt a tattoo, we both kissed a dolphin at the Mirage and Chris laid on Criss Angel's bed of nails. The whole time, no Elvis. At our last stop, Matt had to frost a massive red velvet cake blindfolded. He used his hands rather than the knife to save time. That made a mess and made the cake really gross especially since we had to eat it. Maybe the worst challenge of any race, ever. Still no Elvis. At this point we were at the finish but forced to run back a mile along the strip to find an Elvis, which we eventually did. He was great but it cost us plenty of time. As we headed back to the Luxor we saw the same team we sprinted past in the morning race about 100 yards ahead of us. Our route reconnaissance paid off as we took the best way back and sprinted home seconds ahead of them to secure 5th place in the finals.
* Big TAINT thanks to Mike, Matty Poo Poo, Boosh and Sloppy Jim for awesome clue support.
About 20 minutes later we emerged from the limo and were shuffled with the other 7 teams to a courtyard where we needed to solve a quick puzzle and were awarded a hotel room key. In the hotel room was a locked safe with instructions on how to open. Once we unscrambled the code for the safe, we opened it up and got our clue sheet.
Turns out all teams were driven to downtown Las Vegas about 2 miles north of the strip. Our first challenge was to zip line across downtown. Chris negotiated the zip line while Matt negotiated a drunk tourist on the elevator. Good start. Then Chris and Matt both took a Deuce (its a bus line, seriously) back to the strip. Along the strip we were neck and neck with all the teams. In what proved to be a tactical error, team TAINT decided to skip an early checkpoint to save time but that required us to complete all others. Among them was the task to get a team photo with an Elvis. How hard is it to find an Elvis is Las Vegas?
The next series of checkpoints were great. Chris gave Matt a tattoo, we both kissed a dolphin at the Mirage and Chris laid on Criss Angel's bed of nails. The whole time, no Elvis. At our last stop, Matt had to frost a massive red velvet cake blindfolded. He used his hands rather than the knife to save time. That made a mess and made the cake really gross especially since we had to eat it. Maybe the worst challenge of any race, ever. Still no Elvis. At this point we were at the finish but forced to run back a mile along the strip to find an Elvis, which we eventually did. He was great but it cost us plenty of time. As we headed back to the Luxor we saw the same team we sprinted past in the morning race about 100 yards ahead of us. Our route reconnaissance paid off as we took the best way back and sprinted home seconds ahead of them to secure 5th place in the finals.
* Big TAINT thanks to Mike, Matty Poo Poo, Boosh and Sloppy Jim for awesome clue support.
Elite 8 for Taintastic at the GUR Championship in Las Vegas
After a strong showing in San Francisco, TAINTASTIC was off to Las Vegas to compete against the best at the Great Urban Race (GUR) championship. The morning race faces off 120 teams for the top eight spots who qualify for the final later the same day. Tension was high before the race as top teams scoped out the competition. We were busy trying to fix our mustaches in place.
The morning course took us all over the strip with memorable stops at the Chapel of Love (Chris and Matt are married), Planet Hollywood where Matt ate a bowl of paste and his mustache, and pictures with silver street performers. It came down to the wire where, after 2 and a half hours of racing, Taintastic needed to sprint through the Luxor to pass a team and secure a spot in the Elite 8. The 0.2 second victory was amazing but the finals were looming only a few hours away.
* Huge shout out to Mike, Matty Poo Poo and Boosh for awesome clue support.
The morning course took us all over the strip with memorable stops at the Chapel of Love (Chris and Matt are married), Planet Hollywood where Matt ate a bowl of paste and his mustache, and pictures with silver street performers. It came down to the wire where, after 2 and a half hours of racing, Taintastic needed to sprint through the Luxor to pass a team and secure a spot in the Elite 8. The 0.2 second victory was amazing but the finals were looming only a few hours away.
* Huge shout out to Mike, Matty Poo Poo and Boosh for awesome clue support.
Taintastic! wins SF Oyster 2010
After multiple years of finishing in second place, Taintastic was finally successful in breaking through and becoming the overall winners of the annual SF Oyster urban race. This year's Oyster course lived up to its reputation, as in addition to running 10 miles and biking 20, the team had to complete the following tasks - getting a teammate blindfolded and taken to a secret location, oyster shooters, making guacamole while handcuffed, playing Name That Tune, kayaking, skeeball, beerpong, slacklining, mental puzzles, and more.
Despite the win, there were some lowlights, err, opportunities for the team to improve upon. Needing 42 beerpong tosses to complete 3 cups at only 4 foot range was disappointing. Worse though was the 15 minutes that it took for Marty and Colby to complete a simple puzzle to start the race, which not only left the team in last place, but also left Matt sitting on a bus by himself for 10 minutes with a bag on his head.
Despite the win, there were some lowlights, err, opportunities for the team to improve upon. Needing 42 beerpong tosses to complete 3 cups at only 4 foot range was disappointing. Worse though was the 15 minutes that it took for Marty and Colby to complete a simple puzzle to start the race, which not only left the team in last place, but also left Matt sitting on a bus by himself for 10 minutes with a bag on his head.
Taintastic Goes Top 10 in the 2010 Bear Valley Tough Mudder
In a race featuring steep climbs at elevation, Colby and Matt were able to qualify for next year's Toughest Mudder championship despite the fact that the cold lake swim portion of the race may have rendered the team permanently sterile. On a familiar note, Colby had to "shower" in the parking lot with a 5 gallon water jug in order to make a flight to Italy later that same day.
Taintastic has a Good Showing at 2010 BB Lake Tahoe
In the last sprint race of the Big Blue season, Colby and Matt teamed up to take 2nd place overall (first place in 2-man team division) in a back and forth race that had some tough hill climbing at elevation. It was a good end to the Big Blue season. I'm sure Taintastic will be back next year for more! On a side note, after the race Colby took a "shower" in the parking lot using a 5 gallon water jug before jumping on a plane to Italy. I'm sure his fellow plane passengers appreciated his... "I just raced for 3 hours" Taintastic smell.
TAINT Goes International at Marathon de Medoc
In our quest to conquer bigger and better race venues, TAINTASTIC decided to combine our two greatest loves: racing and drinking. This took Chris and Matt to Bordeaux, France for the 26th Marathon de Medoc. The marathon is unique in a number of ways. First, the course takes you through 55 vineyards over the rolling hills surrounding Medoc. Second, the race stops at 22 Chateaus for wine tasting. Third, the entire 8,500 runners dress up in full costume.
Team TAINT exceeded our running expectations but easily met our goals for costume and drinking. We finished the entire 26.2 including all 22 wine tastings, stopping to dance the Macarena, jumping on stage with one of the bands on the course, taking a semi-professional photo shoot in the vineyards and eating ham in under 4 hours. In fact, we finished 329 out of 6,833 and may have been the fastest team to "complete" the entire course (after mile 10 we were the only runners still drinking). Among our group of racers, TAINTASTIC was awarded the fastest time, most drinks and best costume awards. The Ambiguously Gay Duo was quite popular and surprisingly easy to run in.
The only thing that could have made this race any better would have been stopping in Paris for a few days to do the sewer tour.
Atencion Gros: You may want to avoid the 2010 vintage from Bordeaux. Some of the grapes may have been soiled.
Team TAINT exceeded our running expectations but easily met our goals for costume and drinking. We finished the entire 26.2 including all 22 wine tastings, stopping to dance the Macarena, jumping on stage with one of the bands on the course, taking a semi-professional photo shoot in the vineyards and eating ham in under 4 hours. In fact, we finished 329 out of 6,833 and may have been the fastest team to "complete" the entire course (after mile 10 we were the only runners still drinking). Among our group of racers, TAINTASTIC was awarded the fastest time, most drinks and best costume awards. The Ambiguously Gay Duo was quite popular and surprisingly easy to run in.
The only thing that could have made this race any better would have been stopping in Paris for a few days to do the sewer tour.
Atencion Gros: You may want to avoid the 2010 vintage from Bordeaux. Some of the grapes may have been soiled.
Repeat Win at Urban Dare SF
Colby and Marty successfully defended their title in the Urban Dare San Francisco, winning by over 30 minutes. Great phone support from their significant others was a big key to success. The team almost came to blows when Colby tried to go "Teen Wolf" and steal the ball from his own teammate during a Dare, but they were able to get past it and cruise home to victory.
New TAINTASTIC Record at Great Urban Race in SF.
In our first ever Great Race, Team TAINT set a record for pre-race bathroom stops with 8 total - and that is not a good thing. Fortunately, things got better after the race started. The team was supported by a hungover Keith and Boosh who, despite headaches and less than 3 hours sleep, nailed the clues and got us off to a fast start. We rolled in 5th of 350 teams and "qualified" for the championship in Las Vegas.
Taintastic Wins the Big Blue Sprint in Half Moon Bay
On a day in which the course biked through a swarm of angry bees (read about the bees!), Matt and Marty were lucky to escape with only a few stings on way to victory. Other teams were not as lucky with 5 teams forced to drop from the race due to severe bee stings. The biggest sting of the day came when it was revealed that Todd Jackson didn't know who Marty was, even though he had been racing in the series for 6 years. Marty made up for it, however, by taking home the post-race corn-hole challenge and more Merrell shwag! Taintastic is now undefeated in three Big Blue sprints this year.
Team Reunion but No Podium at 99th B2B
For the first time in a long time, the entire TAINTASTIC team (Colby, Marty, Chris and Matt) raced together at the 99th running of the Bay to Breakers. While we missed a podium finish by ~10,000 spots, we did beat at least three Storm Troopers, a dozen Elvis and one Jabba the Hut with Princess Lea. The team had a great time. Marty may still be walking to his car after strategically parking the night before within 35 blocks of the race finish.
TAINT Win at 2010 BB Red Tail Sprint
Team Taintastic enjoyed our second victory of the 2010 season in the Big Blue Red Tail Sprint with Chris and Colby going wire to wire against a field of 44 teams all vying for the gold. In pure Taint fashion, we also participated in the beer drinking contest that followed the race and finished with a solid 5 beers each. While we clearly won that event as well, it's not so clear if other teams knew that it was a competition. Their loss.
On another front, we found out that our Corn-Hole skills need some brushing up. For obvious reasons, this was surprising to us. The Take-home: Taint needs to clean up the Corn-Hole. Nice job Todd Jackson, for throwing in some extra events at the end of the race for a chance to win more schwag.
On another front, we found out that our Corn-Hole skills need some brushing up. For obvious reasons, this was surprising to us. The Take-home: Taint needs to clean up the Corn-Hole. Nice job Todd Jackson, for throwing in some extra events at the end of the race for a chance to win more schwag.
Podium at Quicksilver AR Challenge
TAINTASTIC added to the team's point total with a 3rd place finish at the 4 hour Quicksilver AR Challenge. Finishing with 450 points, Matt and Colby were only 20 points off the first place team.
Repeat at Folsom Lake in 2010
Team Taintastic gave an encore show at the 2010 Folsom Lake Sprint defending their 2009 title and finishing first overall. Hopefully Matt can stop bleeding in time for the next race. Peeps proved to be great post race food - Happy Easter.
TAINT Wins 2009 SF Oyster
Marty, Colby and Matt cruised to a 1st place finish in the men's division at the SF Oyster defending their title. The team erroneously allowed Matt to lead a beer tasting challenge. After a slight penalty the team was back on the trail and on their way to the win.
TAINTASTIC Wins Again - 2009 Urban Dare
Marty and Colby brought home the gold again for Team Taintastic at the 2009 Urban Dare in San Francisco. They'll be moving on to compete with other areas winners in the championships in a few months.
TeamMATT Featured in SF Examiner
Ever wonder why the sport of cycling is dominated by team work and partnerships but at the end people only remember the one person who sprints to the finish to steal all the glory? We do...
http://www.sfexaminer.com/sports/Personal-Best-Team-gears-up-for-another-run-at-the-Oyster-58816457.html
http://www.sfexaminer.com/sports/Personal-Best-Team-gears-up-for-another-run-at-the-Oyster-58816457.html
Domination at Folsom Lake 2009
Another faceoff between Team Taints with TAINTASTIC racing against So you think your TAINT can dance?. It was the first race of the season for Chris and Matt of the So you think your TAINT can dance? team but both were feeling strong. Marty and Colby were coming off a solid race in Half Moon Bay. After much back and forth, the teams finished #1 and #2 overall with So you think your TAINT can dance? winning by a staggering 60 seconds despite a late mountain bike crash from Chris. In all, it was a great day for the TAINT teams. Marty and Colby hope to defend at Tahoe and earn the overall points lead.
This brings Chris' record against other TAINT teams to 3-0 while the others are all 1-2. Its just a fact.
This brings Chris' record against other TAINT teams to 3-0 while the others are all 1-2. Its just a fact.
